Things to Not Ask the Socially Anxious Bride...

Since our engagement back in February last year, I've encounter a lot of the same questions.
These questions always make me break out into a bit of a cold sweat, I'm quite a worrier, I'm bit crap at social interactions anyway, plus I'm fairly often teetering on the anxious so I find these questions to always be something that makes me fret.



1. What You Ask - Are We Invited?
What We Hear: Can you shell out an extra £50 or so so we may come along?

People ask this a lot, mainly in a jokey way, but sometimes not.
If you're stressing over budgets, catering, numbers and more this is a question that always flusters, creating an awkward situation over whether you are genuinely expecting to be invited, and if too many people are already coming to reasonably afford the wedding of our dreams.
Weddings are expensive, trust me, I know, so adding unnecessary pressure is never welcome.

2. What You Ask - So How Long Have You Been Together?
What We Hear: Let Me Be the Judge of How Strong Your Relationship is!

This is such a loaded question, I'm sure this isn't what people intend when they ask it, but it always makes me think they're going to judge the answer, or why else would they ask it?!
It is a strange question to ask, what difference would time length really make, it isn't about how long you've been together, Edd and I have both been in much longer relationships before, but it's about that emotional connection, the one that makes you realise you do want to spend the rest of your life together.
When people do ask I usually tell them but always feel the need to point out that we knew each other before, we did, but we never really spoke or knew each other well.
But now we know so much about each other, including the fact that we want to share our lives together, and the wedding is just the start of another adventure.

3. What You Ask - Can I be a Bridesmaid/ Can Little Sally be a Flower Girl etc?
What We Hear: I Would Like to Include Myself into Your Big Day.

Choosing your bridesmaids is a big big thing, these are the people you have to trust to help you calm your nerves on the day, help you pee when your dress is just too large, and they're also the people you've said you want there on your big day, to take part in one of the most special moments of your entire life.
Do not ever ask to include yourself, your children, or anyone else into someone else's wedding ceremony.
If you're asked feel amazing that they have invited you to share in their big moment, if you haven't then that isn't a personal vendetta against you.

4. What You Ask - Why Don't you Just D.I.Y Stuff?
What We Hear - It's All So Expensive, Just Make it Instead, I Have a Useful Pinterest Board....

Yes, DIY weddings can be amazing, I'm jealous of those brides who are crafty enough to handmade most things and have a minuscule budget due to it, but not every one can.
Why? Well, I'm working my arse off trying to make enough to pay for a wedding so I don't even have the time, never mind the lack of skills I possess to make things and quickly for however many tables/ people/ inanimate objects that I'd have to make for!
Yeah pinterest has some amazing tips and ideas, but with four months (eek!) to go, I doubt I'm gonna start being Martha Stewart anytime soon.

5. What You Ask - When are you going to have a baby?
What We Hear - BBBAAAAAABBBIIIEEESSS!!

Simple answer is:-
My Womb. My Business.

These may seem a bit daft, even an overreaction but when your stress levels are running at a maximum, plus being asked the same questions constantly for over a year means that these specific questions have made my eyes bulge at some or many points in this time.
Be wary of the bride with social anxiety, she may be somewhat stressed.

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